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Communist Work-Related Humor

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lukematt
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Username: lukematt

Post Number: 10
Registered: 10-2008

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Friday, January 02, 2009 - 02:51 am:Copy highlighted text to 'New Message' boxEdit Post Delete Post Print Post    View Post/Check IP (Moderator/Admin only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only) Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)



How I Became Unemployed

I worked as the general director of a large company. My coffee was prepared by a nice-looking secretary, and I drove to work in a top-end, company car. One day, Communist leaders arrived and told me to give 5,000 Czechoslovak crowns for the funeral of a Communist Central Committee member. I told them, “For 5,000 crowns, I will bury the entire central committee by myself.”

From that time, I worked as the director of a little branch office. My coffee was prepared by an old secretary, and I drove to work in a mid-level, company car. One day, Communist leaders arrived and asked me why I hadn’t attended the last Communist party meeting. I told them, “If I had known it was really the last meeting, I would have arrived with a large ‘Hooray!’ sign.”

From that time, I worked as a foreman. I carried my coffee in a thermos, and I drove to work in my own low-end automobile. On the wall of my work area, I had two posters: Husak (chief of the Czechoslovak Communist Party / President of Czechoslovakia) and a sexy Western movie star.

One day, Communist leaders arrived and told me to take down that whore’s picture. So I took down Husak’s poster.

From that time, I worked as a ditch digger. I went to work on my bicycle. One day, Communist leaders arrived and told me, “Store your bike somewhere because a Russian delegation will tour the area.” I told the leaders, “Don’t worry—my bicycle is locked and has insurance.”

From that time, I am unemployed.


[From the Czech comedians Simek & Grossmann (both deceased)]

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